Festival
Gene Frankel Theatre Festival Winter 2025
Block 6
13 December 2025
In a bittersweet, high tech, but beautifully emotion-driven show written and directed by Bryce Gastelum, Search For What I Left follows two scientists as they experiment on their subjects to answer a question that is perhaps unanswerable and yet has plagued humanity for as long as we have existed: “What is the root cause of human emotion?” In other words what event, specifically, sparked a particular emotion in someone else?
To be completely honest, when I first read the short write up in the playbill and saw that this was a show surrounding “fragmented memories”, scientists in a lab, and their two “subjects” — I had two immediate thoughts:
- This reminds me of the Robin Williams movie called The Final Cut (2004).
- In a show that sounds so Frankenstein in nature, why are subjects referred to as “subjects” and not “monsters”?
Search For What I Left is definitely different than The Final Cut and it, without doubt, answers my question on the terminology used.
Starring Jacksyn Ivy Jane, Anaïs Juiliet, Ainsley Hartke Crotty, and Ricky Bizarro this show is an intelligent, thought provoking exploration into the psychology of human nature. It deals with themes of love, life, death, failure, acceptance, the need to know “why”, moving on, letting go, familiar bonds, heartbreak, and even blame. More importantly, though, Search For What I Left delves into these often tragic topics with dignity, care, respect, and without villainising any of the characters.
Beyond the two scientists, there are also two “subjects” that the scientists are experimenting on. At the beginning of show, the audiences watches as the first subject, a woman, comes alive and struggles as she attempts to piece together her own memories. In an attempt to help spark more memories and get to the root cause of her emotions, the scientists decide to introduce her to another subject, this time a male.
The scenes are nicely sparsed between inside the laboratory where the focus is on the two scientists and in this almost in-between world where the body is dead, but the mind can still be explored, where memories can still be thought of, and emotions still felt — even if only through the means of technology — which focuses on the two subjects.
The chemistry between these actors felt genuine. The emotions felt raw, real, and at times bittersweet, while also being understandable and reasonable. There is the scientific appeal of logic and reason, but perfectly balanced and layered with the irrationality of human emotions that everyone feels (even when we know we shouldn’t).
At its core, this is a show of empathy, compassion, and understanding while also accepting the fact that even if complete knowledge or full understanding were actually achievable it cannot change what has been already be done. Learning and understanding the “why” behind another person’s emotions — whether good or bad — can be a very valuable thing, but only for future situations or even future generations, as a whole. A person can examine that “why” and use it for self reflection, self improvement, and even as a teachable moment for others to learn and improve themselves from. However, it can never fix the past. You cannot unsay the words spoken, you cannot change the emotions felt, you cannot fix the past, but you can change the future.
Search For What I Left is a beautiful play set among a science fiction background, encompassing many human emotions, resulting in a call for action to the audience to at least try and understand the “why” behind the emotions of others (and to self reflect on your own) so that society, even all of humanity can improve, grow, build, and ultimately succeed together.
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